So I lied

In my last post I said I would be updating this a little more frequently. Based on the fact that I said that a month ago, I think it's safe to say you all figured out that I didn't manage to do that. I realized that most of my papers, while perfectly in line with the language part of this blog, have very little to do with what I've really tried to do here: Talk to you about things that I really think matter.

So yes, I'll continue writing here occasionally, and no I won't be posting often enough to gain much attention. I like it that way. Most of you get these updates through Facebook Notes, so you'll still get my occasional supplementary content like viral quizzes.

So what do I think matters? Doing what feels right. The easiest way to discern that is by when we're happy and when we aren't. That's not the only way, but it is an easy way. This is going to be another post related to "I Win," so for those of you who are really familiar with the idea of synthetic happiness, you can probably go get a drink and stop reading very carefully.

There is some good in everything. My car broke down sixty miles away from home, and only though the help of strangers did I get it into Springfield. That was last Friday. I've been without a car all week, but I've still been connected to the world enough to be happy. Going out with friends, talking to people on Facebook, keeping conversations running through text messages. When have I been really happy? When I've been talking with people. When I've been getting new ideas, or hearing old ones, or sharing thoughts with the people I consider friends. How many of you have had the same experience? Feeling like you're going crazy because you're out of touch with your friends? I'm betting I'm not the only one.

So why does this make me happy? Because it's easy for me. It isn't always the path of least resistance. People often disagree with what I say, which makes me think about it, and consider things that I might have otherwise missed. I often disagree with my friends as well. That's how it works. If we were all the same, there would be no reason to share thoughts.

For me, conversation is right. My post about conversation as the art of humanity should be a dead giveaway on that. For other people making things is right. Or helping others. Or any number of other things. But for me, conversation is right. Find what's right for you. Do what you're meant to do. Dare to be happy.

More Thought, I Swear

In recent weeks, my time has been spent with large amounts of reading and research, thinking and writing. It only occurred to me in the past few days that I COULD be sharing this with all of you who regularly read these updates. So that is what I shall do. Maybe some speeches, more likely some papers, perhaps even a few acting journal entries. The frequency will be relatively low, but for a while, The Dress of Thought will be an academic outlet for me.

I hope you're as amused and engaged as I am.

Perspective

People who have known me for a while know that I like to play a game called "I win." It's not like the game popularized by the Adam Sandler movie. It usually involves some situation that apparently seems like there's a clear good outcome and a clear bad outcome, like relationship issues. I don't seem to find things like that anymore, because I'm told I've rebuilt my view of the world in such a way that I cannot lose.

The relationship continues? Making out is awesome. The relationship ends? Cool, more time to hang out with friends I've probably been neglecting. Something is going to happen either way, and if there's something positive about either outcome, why should I worry about it?

There are other times when there's nothing that could be done about a situation, either because it is entirely out of our control or it has already past. I move on, and try to work the change into what I'm already doing. Anything would just be a waste of energy, wouldn't it?

Most situations can go down in a lot of different ways. Is it better to control the situation as much as you can, and try to make it fit what works best for you, or to let it happen naturally and modify your plan as needed? Maybe even to just make up the plan as you go along, so there are no real surprises?

I have to go do something else, now, so I will leave you with that thought, friends. No, I'm sorry, I GET to go do something else now, and I will leave you with that thought, friends. Maybe even I'm going to do something else now, and will leave you with that thought, friends. But I suppose those all mean the same thing.

Don't they?

Reboot

It's been a third of a year since I shared my thoughts with all you wonderful folks. That's too long. I was without a good connection to the internet for 75% of that. The remaining quarter of that time was unacceptable, and I intend to make that right.

Recently, I read an article entitled "We Don't Write, we Speak with our Fingers." That caught my attention. I've studied how to speak, not only the physical act of articulation but also of speechcraft. I've studied how to act, how to use my whole body and mind to communicate an idea. I've never really studied how to write. Sure, I've practiced writing, I've written plenty of papers and critiqued hundreds more. But I'd never formally studied writing. I considered that a shortcoming on my part. Then I read that article, and I realized that I've not been doing myself justice. Maybe other people have the same problem.

Most people I know are gifted with the "artist's eye," that way of viewing the world that lets them see more than the rest of the population. Maybe everyone has it, and it just depends on how much they use it, but it's a lot more common than I think most people realize. But it's not just for artists. Painters, sculptors, sketchers all benefit. But so do writers. So do journalists. So do the actors, the public speakers, the scientists! Seeing is only half of communicating, though. There's also the describing. It's not enough to look out the window; you have to be able to tell everyone else what you see.

People write like they speak. Most have more verbal styles than written styles, but words are still words. It's all governed by how many ways we can think, after all. Sure, King and Kennedy were powerful orators, and understood timing. Cummings uses spacing and punctuation to the same effect.

I thought about using this post as a chance to speak with my fingers more beautifully than I have before. I considered the opportunity to prove my point through example, rather than just through idea. I decided against this. I wrote, instead, a simple copy of my thoughts, and chose to give it to you as it now exists. I did this because I wanted to communicate to you only an idea.

The Art of Being Human

Conversation is satisfying. I really enjoy talking. I’m sure that if you know me very well at all, you’re aware of just how much I enjoy talking. Talking alone in my room without an audience just to hear my own thoughts outside my head, to see if they make sense in the real world. Talking in a group of people at a party about nothing, just enjoying the fact that we can hear and see other people, reveling in the social contact. Talking to friends one on one for hours, without any real purpose, but feeling satisfied at the end. Talking with friends about the important things in life, questioning things that we really believe and hold dear, and having a different perspective on the universe when the conversation is over.

There are ideas out there, rogue constructions that aren’t as satisfying. They’re barely even conversation. These things are usually called logical fallacies. I often call them terrorism, which I learned from this site. These are things that are based not on form, or on content, but rather on things that are not logical. Am I then saying that conversation should be wholly logical? My friends, of course that isn’t what I am saying. These are tools of argument, and tools of poor argument at that. Poor argument, however, has no place in conversation. Emotion, humor and sarcasm are ways to flavor conversation, but poor argument is a way to end

I am not pointing fingers, admonishing anyone who uses these tactics on occasion. I think there are times that we all feel backed into the corner or just use them without even realizing it. But what reason have we to defend? We’re talking about conversation, not a thesis. Don’t defend, just enjoy. Bask in the conversation. Be satisfied.

A/S/L?

“Hi, I’m Scott,” followed by a handshake. In the previous weeks, I’ve been doing this pretty often. The process of meeting a person is one that always feels empty to me. Yeah, it’s great that your name is Rob or Amber, but that doesn’t tell me anything about you. Yes, it’s easy to use when trying to get someone’s attention. We might be thinking of all the other Dans, the other Emilys that we know, and correlating you with them. Then, later, we find out that Alex at this party is nothing like the Alex we know from work. Well then what was the purpose of learning the name first?

What’s the first thing we do when we can’t remember someone’s name, and we’re talking to someone else? “Well, remember that girl that I told you about at the soccer game? The blonde?” We immediately go into physical descriptions, or something based on the limited knowledge we have of the person. If we’re in a relaxed group, we might even use those as secondary classifications. She might just be Blonde Megan, and the other Megan is now Brunette Megan.

Why don’t we all just find a few things about ourselves that we can refer to in meeting someone. Sometimes we do that, anyway. If you’re at a party and you know you have a mutual friend with someone, then the greeting might be “I’m Scott, John’s friend from work.” Even better, though, just give them some idea of who you are. “I’m Scott, a student,” or “I’m Scott, I hope to be a teacher after I graduate,” or maybe even the daring “Hi, I’m Scott, and I collect information and make it my plaything.”

Oh, before you start, I know. You’re multifaceted, and you can’t express all of yourself in a single sentence. They might get the wrong idea of you, they might start thinking of other people they know who are like that, and you don’t want to be judged that way. Well then, Michelle, what happens when you find out that the person you’re talking to used to have a boss named Michelle who she hated? Is that really any better than introducing yourself along with the fact that you love dogs?

Sometimes it would be redundant to just list the same fact, and if you’re meeting multiple people at once, then you don’t want to say “I’m Lance, and I play the trumpet,” a dozen times in a row. If you’re at a trumpeters convention then you might want to have more information to give off the cuff, like how much you enjoy walking barefoot through grass or that you believe strongly in politically correct terminology.

“But Scott,” I hear you all thinking, “What if that person doesn’t like something that we strongly support? I don’t want to risk offending someone from the onset!” Well then, my otters, I’m afraid that you might have to hope that the people you’re dealing with don’t take themselves so seriously that they believe everyone on the planet is exactly like them. Or you could pick things that are relatively innocuous. Sure, new friend Tony might think that Nascar is terrible for the environment, but I don’t think he’s going to hate you forever just because you’re a member of the Church of Dale. And hell, it’ll lead to some interesting conversations, won’t it? “I’m an atheist,” is definitely more of a worthwhile conversation starter than “How about that crazy weather, huh?”

Hi, I’m Scott, and I write a blog on language. It’s nice to meet you.

I Do What I Do

There are some phrases in other languages that English has adopted, and people don’t realize that they originated somewhere other than English. There are others that we’re acutely aware came from another language. Having studied Latin, I tend to notice both types of these, and think about what they mean in English compared to what they mean in Latin.

One of these phrases—one that never fails to entertain me—is Modus Operandi. For those who aren’t familiar with the term, it means “method of operation.” You might have heard it shortened to M.O. Taking this a step further, that means that in the ancient Roman empire, there was a way to say “That’s how I roll.” Keep that in mind next time someone recites Latin to seem intelligent.

Tick Tock

Sometimes you’re sitting, talking with people, and you realize something isn’t quite right. One person might say something, and the mood of the entire room just changes. Sometimes things darken, smiles fall away from faces, and you’re left thinking “What just happened?” It’s not that people are angry, or depressed, the conversation isn’t a loss. It just takes a while for people to start laughing again, because it’s almost like they forgot that they could do that. I always wonder how often that happens and I don’t realize it, I just miss the moment entirely. More importantly, how many times do I perceive those moments when they haven’t happened? How often do we have days or weeks like this, where we feel like some aspect of life is uplifting or draining us without rhyme or reason? The sun is good at that. When it’s here, people are generally happier, and when it’s gone, we tend to be more fragile. We always have to comment on it, too.

Mood and conversation are two topics that I find myself thinking about a lot. Consequently, I talk and write about relatively often. They’re both outward representation of thought, which is what the title of this blog is really about. Samuel Johnson said, “Language is the dress of thought.” I don’t entirely agree with that statement, but it does represent a part of my own internal reality. That’s what this blog itself is about: the things that are real to me.

A recent switch

A good friend of mine, Dan, has claimed that he uses his weblog as an introspective tool. Sure, people read it, but that’s not the purpose. This is my first post on this site, after a brief time blogging on Meet the Phlockers. I felt that it was time to change sites, not for any conscious reason, but rather because it just felt right. I’m not going to question that sort of urge, because I know that it really doesn’t make a difference. This is just a minor change that I’ll adjust to.

It’s Saint Patrick’s day. Slainte mhath. It’s just spring enough that people are starting to beat back the lower mammalian instincts that say it’s time to pair off. People around me get frustrated at this time every year. I don’t understand it. This is when the world is finally warming up enough that you can walk outside without fearing death from the cold. The sun has returned. The world knows it. The birds are louder. Rodents are peeking out. Even the grass has decided it’s okay to show up again. What is there to be unhappy about? I don’t have answers. I don’t particularly want answers, I probably wouldn’t like them. But I have plenty of questions. Maybe there’s nothing to be unhappy about. I could be right.